social media pressure

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So, hi. Hello hello, welcome back.

I don’t know who I’m welcoming back, maybe it’s you… maybe it’s me… maybe it’s me welcoming us both back.

As you can tell, I took a little blog break and it was definitely an impromptu one. I was struggling during Blogtober and I fell off near the end of the month, but I had planned on posting a few times a week… and to be honest, I never got around to it.

Sometimes I’m really in it and other times, I get really discouraged when it comes to this blog.

I find that I get hyper-focused on one certain type of posts and then I do everything that I can to keep them flowing but I get bored. I feel like I’m on autopilot.

& I also start to feel a ton of pressure.

Really silly pressure, but pressure nonetheless and it starts to weigh me down.

Before I get in any deeper about what I really want to talk about today, I just want to take a minute & discuss this outfit because 1) ponchos are the greatest creation, 2) H&M’s skinny jeans are to die for, 3) I’m loving AA bodysuits and 4) I love a good grey on grey outfit combo for fall.

These jeans, like I said, are my absolute favourites. I swear by American Eagle and Hollister jeans, but I could never find the perfect grey pair from either store. When I was in H&M a couple months ago, I saw these pair and had to try them out. My BF swore by H&M jeans ( ’til I recently converted him over to Hollister! ) so I knew they must be good. H&M jeans are a little bit stiffer than my AE & HCo pairs, but I do love the way they are fashionable, don’t have the obnoxious bird on them in the most random places and are pretty comfy.

Lately I’ve been replacing black on black with grey on grey and I’ve been loving it! Grey is just a lighter, fresher colour, but it still screams fall. I added a pop of blush pink with the shoes and overall I love this outfit & if I’m being honest – it’s one that I’d totally wear out ( and have worn out! ). See below…

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Social media is an ever-present thing in our daily lives and to be extremely honest, I think social media sucks. There are such GREAT aspects of it – I love feeling connected, I love being able to share ( whatever parts of ) my life that I wish to with others, I love reading and viewing other people’s lives ( because I’m crazy nosy ) and I love how it has such power in our world ( look at the recent US election. I know I’m not the only one that’s so over hearing about it, but look at the power that celebs and others are having, to share their opinions and help change, ultimately, the world ).

But there are also the downsides of social media… the connection, the sharing, the reading and viewing other peoples lives and the power that it has. << sound familiar?

I guess that maybe one of the reasons that I stopped posting on my blog for a while because I was feeling a huge overwhelming amount of PRESSURE.

Pressure to look one way.

Pressure to look another way.

Pressure to wear nice clothes and eat pretty food, shop constantly and wear shoes that I wouldn’t normally wear.

Pressure to drink pretty drinks and to wear my hair down, put on makeup and not wear sweatpants every single day.

Pressure to add content to not only one thing, but to multiple ( blog, Twitter, Instagram & Facebook ) and also live my life to the fullest each and every day.

Pressure to be someone that I am not.

All because through social media, we are in a constant rollercoaster of emotions, comparisons, criticisms and self-doubt.

It’s so overwhelming to post a picture on Instagram and watch the ‘likes’ pile in.

It’s so overwhelming to tweet on Twitter and watch the ‘retweets’ occur.

It’s so overwhelming to make sure that you are constantly scrolling, liking, favouriting ( is that even what you do on Twitter anymore? ) and retweeting.

It’s so overwhelming to make sure that you are posting content and connecting with others.

It’s so overwhelming to create content that you are proud of and to make your feed really POP.

I know I’m not the only one who gets discouraged when you post this picture that you love and it only gets a few likes, compared to the picture that you were ‘meh’ about that got a ton of likes.

We’re constantly pressured to be present on social media, one way or another – posting, liking, commenting, scrolling… scrolling… scrolling, thinking ‘OMG that would make such a cute Insta pic’ or ‘ohhh I could tweet about that!’…

Scrolling… scrolling… & scrolling some more.

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This little blog break was definitely not planned and longer than I had imagined it would be once I accepted the fact that I was actually taking a break. I’ve been pretty active on Twitter but my Instagram has been pretty quiet.

I’m taking the pressure that I’ve been feeling lately and throwing it away. I’m done feeling this way.

I feel like it’s really hard when you’re growing your blog or any social platform because you’re constantly seeing other bloggers, Instagrammers, etc. posting super cute and gorgeously curated content. It’s hard to not compare yourself to them, but in reality, you’ll never be them.

You really never will.

You are you, I am me, and Amber Fillerup Clark is Amber Fillerup Clark ( even though we ALL secretly want to be her – I mean the hair, the dogs, the kids… kidding! ).

We all start at the bottom and we all have to work our way up. Some of us will take a little bit longer than others, and others will climb to the top quickly but not really enjoy the moment.

I guess we’re all on this rollercoaster together.

I’m here to be me, and to be really, truly, authentically, intimately ( get it? ) ME. And that’s all I can really do.

So welcome back. I’m so happy to be here again & I’m so happy you’re here, too.

Let’s tackle this rollercoaster together yet again.

x JE

october15-11Poncho – Forever 21 ( but from a few seasons ago, sorry! ) | Bodysuit – American Apparel | Skinny Jeans – H&M ( new favs!! ) | Shoes – Payless ( similar, but in black )


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